Dear So and So

Dear Motivation,
First off, I hate you. And I'll never understand you. You stuck around for most of the semester, but I'm not officially in the full swing of final exams. And you have abandoned me. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!? Stupid traitor.

Ugh,
Emily

Dear Mariah,
Diva much? I guess it's cool and all that you renew your vows every year, but a ring pop replica ring in diamonds? Really? And it's seriously not even that cute; it's just gaudy.

Get real,
Emily

Dear Hubby McDreamy,
Is it even possible for a human male to be more delicious than you? Just when I thought you couldn't get cuter, you went off and got cuter. Sigh. I heart you.

XOXO,
Your wifey

Whoopi,
This is just one of your latest fashion faux pas. I'd be here for days if I tried to incorporate them into this blog post. I don't get it. Not only do you look like you are "pinching pennies" in order to keep from passing gas, you clearly don't know the correct size of clothes that you wear. NOTHING about this look is flattering. Do something. Now. And why is it so hard to actually wear your glasses where they should be rather than on the tip of your nose? You can't even see things there, so why wear them at all?

Appalled,
Emily
P.S. This pic is from the Met's Costume Institute Gala. I have no idea who that guy is with you, but he doesn't make you look any better and his look is pretty terrible himself. But hey, at least you're consistent in your "pinching pennies" face.

Kelly,
I can't believe you went out in public like this. You hair is similar to an old grandma's bad dye job. It's so not fashionable. And just for now, I'll get over the fact that your clothes aren't anywhere close to matching. But, I CAN'T get past the socks with sandals. It's NEVER okay.

Horrible,
Emily


Dear Amazon,
Next Thursday, you better have BOTH of the following DVDs on my doorstep as soon as humanly possible. I have been waiting for these DVDs for months (I'm not kidding) and I'll officially be done with school by Thursday at noon, so you better not let me down. I have bought many things from you, and you haven't disappointed yet. So don't fail me now.

Don't make me hate you,
Emily