Perspective

Sometimes, things happen in our lives that completely put everything into perspective. I'm sure that seems like common sense, but it really hit me today.

I was going about, minding my own business (and doing my best to forgive mean people from the "spoiled brat" post, I might add), and my Dad called. I didn't really think anything of it; we talk usually at least every other day, but most of the time every day. If we don't actually "talk", we do text at least once a day.

He asked about my day, I asked about his. We talked about school, my grades. Did I need any money? Had I heard from Katie today? Typical conversation topics. He sounded a little bit tired, but no more than usual, so I just assumed that he was still catching up on sleep from a crazy weekend.

He also told me about a man he had met with who was telling him about one of his farmhands. Apparently, the hand was in his early 20's and had been in and out of jail, doing drugs, drinking, etc. This man had tried to help him by offering him a job and to help him get out of the hole he had dug himself. Turns out, the hand just took advantage of him. Understandably, the employer was frustrated. Him and my Dad then started talking about their own kids and families.

My dad told me that he had told the man: "You know, we just don't know how lucky we are to have good kids."

The man said "You aren't kidding; it makes life a lot easier."

I must admit, I could've cried. Sure, I try my best to be a "good kid" for my parents, but I've certainly done some things that I wouldn't qualify as "good kid" moments. I've also done things that probably do fall under the "good kid" category. I was so happy that he recognized how much my sister and I try to make him proud.

I said, "well, it's easy to be a good kid when you have amazing parents." SO true.

He just said "Em, it's true. Both of you have always been amazing kids."

Holding back tears, I somehow mumbled a "thank you".

Then, he asked me:

"Do you remember R.B. (obviously he said the man's real name, but I'm not going to put it here) from a few sales that you've done with me? Hispanic, longer black hair, really nice man?"

I said, "well, I think I've heard the name but I don't think I would know his face. How come?"

"Not sure if you saw the news or not, but there was a man who was driving a tractor with a front loader and he ended up having an accident and it killed him."

Me: "Oh no! That's terrible."

He said "Yeah, it's too bad; he's been a pretty good friend to me and I always thought he was a great guy"

Me: "Man, Dad. I'm sorry. That is really sad; I can't imagine. Does anyone know what happened exactly?"

Him: "I don't think so; he wasn't with anyone and it must have happened in the late evening because they didn't find him until after 9 PM."

Me: "Wow, that's soooo sad."

Just the day before, I had told him about the spoiled brat incidence as well as another school issue going on (one of my friends was unnecessarily catty with me when I didn't save her from failing a test---don't get me started on that one). Basically, he had asked about my day and I had moaned and groaned because someone hurt my feelings. Then, the tractor incident happened.

Enter: perspective.

Him: "I guess this just shows that sometimes it's not worth being mad over things (me or the catty friend) that you can't control; you could be here one day, and gone the next." He did not intend to give me a guilt trip at all, but I knew that what he said was true.

Me: "That is so true, Dad. Wow."

The perspective was even more noticeable now. Sure, I had had a bad day. What human hasn't? (If you know someone who hasn't, send them my way so I can pick their brain.)

But then, this tragedy occurred. Someone had just lost their son, father, uncle, and best friend, among so many other things. Those people will be cheated out of time with R.B. forever.

My bad day was temporary. Being called spoiled, and having hurt feelings didn't just rob me of my life full of blessings. And it didn't rob me of more memories with my precious family and friends.

I give ANYONE permission to call me "spoiled" and even "rotten" and "brat" if it means I get to stay alive. And if my family is healthy and alive. I'll gladly be a "good kid" if it takes less stress off my parents; I'll do anything (within reason) to make them proud. Anything.

That accident could have happened to anyone. What if that had been MY Dad? What if I never got to see his name light up my caller ID? What if I never got the chance to make my Mom a grandmother? What if I never got to take my sister to that Bon Jovi concert and on a fully paid (by me) vacation? And to think that the day before they could have died, I was griping about "mean girls". There's no way I could ever forgive myself. Instead of saying "Hey Dad, I love you", I would've been the one saying "people are so mean, Dad."

I realize that no one has the ability to know what their future holds, and it's not plausible to become a hermit, too afraid to actually live for fear of what could be. But I know I could use some practice on focusing on the blessing instead of the thorns of life. Because in actuality, I don't have many thorns in my life.

I guess I'm just feeling guilty for griping when my life is so wonderful. The entire day was an enormous wake-up call.

So I pray that next time someone hurt my feelings, instead of griping, I'll take a deep breath, close my eyes and pray for those people to see Jesus in me. I owe Jesus that much (at least). And hopefully, I'll learn to count my blessings a lot more often.